Death to the Pariah

The adrenaline rush was so rife! I never felt more alive in my whole life Then I did when I died The last thing I remember in the concluding moments of life Was how I wailed my eyes out in the bathtub I could taste a mixture of blood and mucus in my throat Blood clots the size of liver fell out of my nostrils in attempt To cease my epistaxis I felt like gagging but nothing came up I screeched as loud as I possibly could But how could anybody hear me If I was unable to hear my own voice? I couldn’t move It felt like sleep paralysis Only this time there was certainty of no awakening I couldn’t hear myself scream But I could hear my heartbeat Which was louder than the Krakatoa volcanic eruption of 1883 The clamorous sound provoked my eardrums to rupture I didn’t plead to God for forgiveness Rather, I told him that if I was ever the reason someone felt this way Then indeed this was justice today How lucky I was for the delay I had only led myself astray I soiled myself out of fear But everything was now crystal clear The image of your face disappeared Reappeared, and then finally went away The irony of it all is that you were the cause of my decay Long before death came and broke the belay Your body was my casket where I willingly rest my soul to lay