A door to the past
by Nasheetah Arendse
I hate carrying these past scars into the life I have now,
I’m ashamed of the wounds that haven’t healed over time,
I hate that these blades were never mine but yet
carved into me so deeply it ended up becoming one.
I realized that we will always be connected as long as that door is open,
I will always hear about him and the roads will always
lead back to the memories I’ve tried so hard to forget.
I have no more love left in my heart for that story,
but the trauma seemed to hold me each time I heard his name.
I forgave but my heart still remembers the pain he caused,
so crossing paths with him every time will always reopen the wound that I closed with distance.
So for my sake to move forward I’ll have to sacrifice
a closeness to someone I hold dear,
all because she’s the doorway of my past,
holding onto a memory that will always last.
Maybe the space doesn’t have to be long,
but I need distance to seal the wounds that
I can’t afford to bring into the next chapters of my life.
Published on the Writory Wall.