Writing About Regret Without Writing a Mistake Poem

Regret is the most self-pitying subject in poetry and the most likely to be a confession. A judge on the three moves that turn a regret poem into a real one, the test that tells you if the poem is about the regret or about you, and the one image that always works.

Regret is the most self-pitying subject in poetry, and it is the most likely to be a confession. Every contest pile has a stack of regret poems that are about the thing the poet did wrong, and the confession is the thing that makes the poem a diary entry instead of a poem.

The regret poem that works is not about the regret. It is about the person who is carrying it.

The confession trap

The confession poem is the one that tells you what the poet did wrong. The mistake, the sin, the thing they wish they had not done. It is honest and it is flat, because the regret is the subject and the subject is the one thing the reader already knows.

A poem about regret should not confess the regret. It should describe what the regret does to the person who is carrying it.

The three moves that turn a regret poem into a real one

Move one: the specific thing regretted. The regret poem that works is about a specific thing, not a general one. The poem that says 'I regret my life' is a poem about the idea of regret. The poem that says 'I regret the way I said goodbye' is a poem about a specific moment, and the moment is the regret.

Move two: the carrying. The regret poem that works is about the way the regret is carried, not the way it is felt. The poem that says 'I am sorry' is a poem about the feeling. The poem that says 'I still drive the long way past the house' is a poem about the carrying, and the carrying is the regret.

Move three: the lesson that is not a lesson. The regret poem that works does not end with a lesson. It ends with the thing that the regret has made possible, the thing that would not exist without it. The poem that says 'I learned' is a poem that is over. The poem that says 'I still set the table for two' is a poem that is still going.

The test that decides

Here is the test I use on my own regret poems, and it is the only one that matters: is this poem about the regret, or is it about the person who is carrying it? If the poem is about the regret, it is a confession. If it is about a specific person doing a specific thing, it is a poem.

The confession is the poem that could be about anyone's regret. The real poem is the one that could only be about yours.

The one image that always works

The image that always works in a regret poem is the one that is so specific it could only belong to the person the poem is about. The way they still drive the long way past the house. The way they still set the table for two. The way they still say the name to an empty room. The image that is so small and so specific that it could not be a symbol; it could only be a fact.

The regret poem that works is the poem that has one of those images in it, and the image is the thing that makes the poem true.

Where it goes wrong

The trap is the poem that is about the feeling instead of the person. 'I regret' is a feeling; 'I still drive the long way past the house' is a person. The feeling is the cliché; the person is the poem.

If you want to see a regret poem that is about the person, the prompts library has a set on the past and the self, and the contest window is open when the draft is ready. Regret is not the subject. The person is.

Keep reading

For the craft side, the regret collection covers the deeper method. The volta module is the page to read next, and the old-poems module is where the work goes when it is done.

By Writory Editorial, for Writory.

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